The Sheridan Sooners: A Legacy of Thievery

~CONTENT POWERED BY ANTELOPE BUTTE FOUNDATION~


The air is alive with excitement in the year 1889. Dr. Herman Hollerith receives the 1st US patent for a mechanical tabulating machine, the Ivory Coast is declared a protectorate of France, and Rudolph, Crown Prince of Austria, commits a murder-suicide with his mistress Mary Vetsera. The atmosphere was galvanized with the upcoming turn of the century, the promise of the future, and probably cholera. All of these promises (hopefully minus the cholera) wrapped in a beautifully manifested destiny led to the Oklahoma Land Grab: on April 22, an estimated 50,o00 enterprising Americans lined up for the chance to lay claim to two million acres of unassigned land in the Oklahoma territory.

Every year, the same electrifying promise of possibility and fortune stirs in the souls of Sheridan residents. Much like our forefathers, lined up with their bags of salt-meat and new fangled repeating rifles, the people of our quaint settlement wait to mark their rightful place to enjoy the spectacle of the Rodeo Parade. Two events, seperated by hundreds of years but conjoined by a common spirit. However, where there lies a system, there will always be those who seek to take advantage of it. 130 years ago, these people were known as “sooners,” settlers who entered and claimed ownership of the land in the Land Grab before the official start of the event. The Sheridan Sooners (as we’re now officially dubbing them) follow in their footsteps, sullying the untainted land between Sanfords and the Wyo Theater with their lawn chairs, big gulps, and entitlement.  Using such tactics as zip-tying, chaining, welding, and crocodile-guarded moats, the ever pristine realty of the eastern side of Main Street is usurped from under the noses of red-blooded, red meat eating Americans. sooners

Rare photo of  the Sheridan Rodeo Parade

 

The Parade, which in French means “to watch balloons and horses,” is a great way to get sunburnt to the point of crispiness, lose your children, and spend $8 for a bottle of water. How dare these people sully that grand tradition with their intrepid disregard for the laws of the land. Yeah, I’m talking to you, Frank. You know that spot by the rhino statue is mine, and still every year you try to snake it from me.

This Friday the 14th at 10 AM, come on down and squeeze your way (past those rapscallion Sooners) to the front of the line and enjoy the yearly procession of things that make Sheridan, and by extension the rodeo, fantastic.


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