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SHERIDAN, WY — Researchers believe that a garage door discovered in Sheridan is likely the coolest in the known universe.
Situated on the north side of the building at the corner of Broadway and Mandel streets — formerly the Poll Motor showroom — the door is an exact replica of the Wyoming state flag.
Dr. Philip Kearny, lead researcher with the Black Tooth Institute for Innovative Structural Design, said his team came across a few noteworthy doors in their research, but nothing that could match that found in Sheridan.
“It’s a once-in-a-lifetime find,” Kearny said of the door’s discovery. “Our research unearthed an impressive door in New Zealand, and NASA’S Curiosity Mars rover transmitted images of an interesting garage door on that planet, but without a doubt, this one paying homage to the Wyoming state flag is the coolest design we’ve uncovered.”
Kearny said his research team was amazed by the accuracy of the replica.
“Both the authenticity and attention to detail of the flag are incredible. Color match is impeccable: the red and white border, the field of blue, the state seal branded on the white bison. Scale and proportion are spot-on. In a word: perfection.”
Also factored in the team’s declaration of the door’s status as best in the universe was the unmatched aura of the state itself, according to Kearny. “When you think Wyoming, you think sheer awesomeness: independence, uprightness, can-do spirit, freedom and wide-open spaces. No other state in the union, country on Earth or colonization on another planet can match that.”
Researchers noted that a Colorado state flag garage door was least appealing in the universe.
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